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Parody of MeetTheNRA

I have more ideas than I have time to implement, unfortunately. But looking over the latest creation of our sad and pathetic friends at Coalition to Stop Gun Violence Ownership, I’m struck by how easy this Meet the NRA site would be to parody, given how pathetic many of their gotchas are. I was thinking the parody would go something like this, picking Bob Smith as a generic name to act as a stand in for any given Board member:

In 2011, Bob Smith walked into a bar for a drink. Two hours later, well known white supremacist and conspiracy theorist Bill Halfwit came into the same bar, and reportedly sat in the same seat as Mr. Smith. Mr. Smith had left his attaché case under the bar. Halfwit turned the case into the bartender, and it was later returned to Mr. Smith. This demonstrates the links NRA Board Member have with the white supremacist movement. It was also reported the Attaché case was made by a company that employes child labor in China.

Or maybe something like this:

In 2008, an article written by Mr. Bob Smith of the NRA Board appearing in the February 2007 issue of American Rifleman was found at a shooting bench. Three hours before, the Citizen’s Militia of Bungsucker County had been drilling at the range, occupying the majority of shooting benches. Mr. Smith’s ties to right-wing militias are clear.

Finally:

In 1946, NRA Board Member Bob Smith, just getting started in his career as a criminal defense attorney, defended a one Jimmy Billabob on a tax matter. Billabob, in 1956, gave a speech to his County Sewage Improvement Board favoring a policy segregation, declaring “There ain’t pooh from any colored feller that’s fit to mingle with mine!” During Smith’s career as a defense attorney, he associated with a large number of unsavory characters, declaring that “Every man, even racist men, have a right to fair trial,” as he defended every manner of person from murderers to Klan members. Fortunately, Mr. Smith has since retired from defending murderers, rapists, and Klan members, but rumors of involvement with defending right-wing militias still persist.

All of these are based on actual accusations, and the general tone of the site, but exaggerated to a greater level of ridiculousness make the parody. I think this was meant to help CSGV attract more members of the loony left, and probably also give them a way to fill out their day in a way that will help them forget the fact that they are being pummeled into oblivion by a bunch of people they feel are beneath them. I suspect it’s more the latter. For their sake I hope it is, since we discovered the loony left doesn’t seem to be too fond of their agenda.

 

2 Responses to “Parody of MeetTheNRA”

  1. A Critic says:

    I like this bit about R. Lee Ermey:

    Asked in the same interview if he would ever run for elected office, he responded, “No. This old man has too many skeletons in the closet. I frequented a few too many whorehouses, tattoo parlors and places of ill repute in my time. Boy, could they have a ball with me, digging up bones.”

    HOORAH! Gotta love that honesty!

  2. Instinct says:

    I love the Tom Selleck quote they use to try and make him look like an extreme anarchist “There are a lot of things about cigars I love because of the anarchist in me.” Regarding the antismoking movement, Selleck said, “Solutions to problems in a free society are messy. There are no magic bullets, no bumper-sticker solutions. If we want an authoritarian state, we can continue to do the kind of stuff we’re doing now about smoking.”

    Wow, what a radical!

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