Our opponents seem to be channeling Jeff Foxworthy. Well, two can play at this game. Let’s give it a go. You’re probably an anti-gun extremist if …
- You think the Second Amendment was written to protect state militia’s rather than the individuals who compromised them. Lately you’ve changed your tune, and grudgingly accepted it protects your right to have a gun in your home, but only because the activist wing-nut Supreme Court made it the law of the land.
- You wet your pants at the idea that gun manufacturers are responding to market demand by making guns in different colors.
- You a .410 inch hole in a target is acceptable, but a .50 caliber hole is just insanity, because you know nothing about exterior ballistics or firearms.
- You think criminals are deterred by background checks. When evidence shows they can get around it, you say the solution is we need another law criminals won’t follow.
- You argue that an assault rifle is distinguishable from a hunting rifle because you’re ignorant and don’t know the definition of either. Because the assault rifle looks scary, clearly it’s different.
- You think firearms training should be required, but outlawed.
- You call anyone who disagrees with you Â an “insurrectionist,” “mentally ill,” “extremist,” or in need of a “good therapist.”
- You argue that the main purpose of a silencer is exactly what you’ve seen in movies, and believe it actually makes a gun silent.
- You think children are anyone under 21, and shouldn’t be able to say gun, let along touch one.
- You don’t believe there’s any such thing as a justifiable homicide if it involves a gun.
- You think a citizen’s paramilitary militia is a body of completely psychotic and deranged individuals rather than people who are concerned about government following the constitution and who like to play army in the woods.
- You don’t believe in “due process” for fundamental constitutional rights, at least if the amendment that protects it starts with a “2.”
- You believe any flawed science and statistical analysis anyone puts in front of you because you know nothing of science and statistics and the analyses confirms your biases.
- You are unconcerned about the rash of home invasions by jackbooted government agents using military tactics to serve warrants on non-violent offenders.
- You label pro-gun advocates as people who are unconcerned about criminal access to guns because pro-gun advocates don’t accept you’re solutions actually work.
And unlike Mr. Odinson, I have provided links to show our opponents actually do believe those things. I was going to link to the 50 Caliber Terror website, but I notice, like most of the rest of the gun control movement, it’s become defunct.