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Asking the Important Legal Questions

Is it legal to eat your cat? In New York State, the answer is apparently no:

When police in Western New York pulled over Gary Korkuc for blowing off a stop sign on Sunday, they found a live cat in his trunk, covered in cooking oil, peppers, and salt. Korkuc told authorities that his pet feline was “possessive, greedy, and wasteful” and that he intended to cook and eat it. Korkuc has been charged with animal cruelty. Is there a legal way to cook and eat a cat?

Maybe in some places, but not New York.

I think in Pennsylvania this would likely also be illegal unless you slaughter it according to state law, which stipulates methods that animals can be slaughtered (firearms are among the methods permitted for taking animals). It certainly could be possible to legally eat your cat in Pennsylvania, but I’m pretty sure slathering your live kitty with cooking oil, pepper and salt isn’t the beginning of a legal slaughtering method, and itself might be considered cruelty.

Personally, I think salt and pepper is a really unimaginative seasoning mix for Felis Catus. I would think at the least, a marinade is called for.

UPDATE: It would seem it was chili peppers and red peppers, from the more detailed article. Better, at least.

13 Responses to “Asking the Important Legal Questions”

  1. ExurbanKevin says:

    Apparently, in New York, there isn’t any way you can skin a cat.

    Thank you. I’ll be here all week. Please, try the veal.

  2. Bitter says:

    Leave it to California to have the most broad statutes. Of course, my kangaroo boots are illegal there, too. (At least the importation & sale of them is banned, but it seems LL Bean doesn’t advertise the boots are banned for sale on their website anymore, and that article says the state F&G doesn’t give a damn about the law & known violators – they have bigger priorities with only a couple of hundred officers.)

  3. Dannytheman says:

    Does that hold true in NYs China Town? I’m pretty sure you pay extra for that. I like my cat with Pork Fried Rice!!

  4. Ed says:

    Oh my…so many inappropriate jokes, so few other jobs out there after I get fired.

  5. mikee says:

    If the cat was still alive and being marinated in chili peppers, that is indeed cat cruelty. On the other hand, four drumsticks!

  6. Heather from AK says:

    This guy also was mad at his neutered male cat for getting pregnant…

  7. Sebastian says:

    Pretty clearly the elevator was having difficulty getting to the top.

  8. BobG says:

    “Korkuc told authorities that his pet feline was “possessive, greedy, and wasteful” and that he intended to cook and eat it.”

    Damn, that description would apply to a lot of people’s children…

  9. J Richardson says:

    All I could think about when I read that story was an old episode of Hill Street Blues. Belker, the grungy undercover cop, was in an alley eating what he thought was chicken with some derelict. He asked the homeless guy about his cat Fluffy. The guy just smiled.

  10. The LIVE cat was slathered with cooking oil etc? I guess cooking a LIVE cat might just BE animal cruelty. However, since the cat was alive, my guess is that he hadn’t started cooking it yet, so the cruelty hadn’t really officially started. Right?

    It’s like the old gag… It’s not child abuse untill you rip the duct tape OFF the child.

    Hmmm… Maybe the intent was enough in this case…

    s

  11. Marinating it while still alive (and presumably covered in fur)? The reasons involved? There was a time when this would have led to an observational stay. It perhaps still should.

  12. Merle says:

    Actually, cats are tough & stringy. They come out better if left in a crock pot for three days.

    Merle

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