Not Something You Read Everyday

From a news report on a Pittsburgh apartment fire:

Once the fire fight was over, crews said they found a partially-damaged AK-47 assault rifle, which will be checked for proper ownership.

Officers said they will check to see if the alligator, which was unharmed by the fire, needs an exotic pet permit or if it already has one.

Well, okay then. Pretty sure ATF isn’t going to be able to trace the alligator though.

The Obvious

Sometimes, it’s just better left unsaid.

A car crashed into a South Jersey bar Thursday morning, leaving one man dead, two others seriously injured — including a man celebrating his birthday — and thousands in the area without power for a few hours. …

Investigators believe alcohol was involved in the crash that left passenger, 33-year-old Kevin Botta of Somers Point, dead.

Really? They only believe that alcohol was involved? What was the first clue? The fact that the driver ran into a building? Or the fact that the building he ran into was a bar?

It just gets weirder.

The crash also sent a fire hydrant flying through the air, hitting 26-year-old Joseph Higbee of Northfield who was standing outside of the bar. He was at the bar to celebrate his birthday.

“The fire hydrant actually went over close to a city block,” said Fire Chief Michael Sweeney.

Just wow. Remember, the car hit a fire hydrant hard enough to send it flying for nearly a block and hit a man. Investigators only believe alcohol may have been involved.

Militia Crazy

The Sovereign Citizens are always the most entertaining:

Fast forward to December 15. The pre-trial hearing got off to a bad start when Cox refused to remove his trademark hat. Then a member of Cox’s militia entourage, Ken Thesing, announced that he was representing Cox, calling himself the militia leader’s “counsel before God.” Next, Cox attempted to serve the judge with a bundle of paperwork. “You’re now being treated as a criminal engaged in criminal activity, and you’re being served in that manner,” Cox told District Court Judge Patrick Hammers.

He’s the youngest, most clean cut guy I’ve noticed pulling this kind of stuff. Usually this kind of orneriness doesn’t set in until middle age. No word yet on whether the courtroom in question has a fringed flag, but they have already declared it an admiralty court.

Can’t Get a Home Depot Line of Credit if You’re a Gun Company

Not because of Home Depot though, but because their credit is underwritten by Citibank, who have a very odd explanation for why they denied a gun businesses line of credit. Apparently they prohibit lines of credit to people who manufacture and sell firearms for military use. That’s very strange. I wonder why this is.