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Damned Kids Wouldn’t Stay off His Lawn

So he resorted to fox urine to repel the trespassers.

A 50-year-old man told authorities he was fed up with teens toilet-papering his house during homecoming week. This year, he decided to defend his property — with a squirt gun filled with fox urine.

Now, Scott Wagar is in trouble with the law. He pleaded not guilty on Wednesday in Kandiyohi County District Court to misdemeanor assault and other charges. He was released on personal recognizance.

What I don’t get is why he’s being charged.  I don’t know about Minnesota, but in Pennsylvania you can use force to defend property.  Not deadly force, but force:

§ 507. Use of force for the protection of property

(a) Use of force justifiable for protection of property.–The use of force upon or toward the person of another is justifiable when the actor believes that such force is immediately necessary:

(1) to prevent or terminate an unlawful entry or other trespass upon land or a trespass against […]

[…] (1) The use of force is justifiable under this section only if the actor first requests the person against whom such force is used to desist from his interference with the property, unless the actor believes that:

(i) such request would be useless;

(ii) it would be dangerous to himself or another person to make the request; or

(iii) substantial harm will be done to the physical condition of the property which is sought to be protected before the request can effectively be made.

I can’t imagine Minnesota can be all that different.  But it seems to me if kids are TPing your property, you’re justified in squirting piss on them if they won’t leave you alone.

UPDATE: Yep, Minnesota law is similar:

Sec. 609.06. Authorized use of force. Reasonable force may be used upon or toward the person of another without his con-sent when the following circumstances exist or the actor reasonably believes them to exist:

[…]

(4) When used by any person in lawful possession of real or pet-sonal property, or by another assisting him, in resisting a trespass upon or other unlawful interference with such property; or

I guess the charges will hinge on fox urine not being “reasonable” use of force.  Good luck finding a jury who’s going to convict on that.  I sure as hell wouldn’t.

12 Responses to “Damned Kids Wouldn’t Stay off His Lawn”

  1. acosenza2 says:

    I consider fox piss justifiable, and funny as hell. It could have been worse, he could have crapped in a bag and threw it at them lol.

  2. OrangeNeckInNY says:

    He should’ve used Eaux De Skunque

  3. RKM says:

    Sure fox piss is justified. Not so long ago, it would have been rocksalt via 12 ga.

    I can see the jury holding back laughs as the kids and arresting officer testifiy.

  4. tjbbpgob says:

    I’ve got a brother-in-law who thinks that t.p.ing someones yard and trees is hillareous. I had to get all serious on him to make him believe that his sister and I thought it was a really bad idea. The fox urine must have been expensive, having never seen that scent at WallyWorld.

  5. Tom says:

    ah, money and time well spent fighting “real” crime. Well done gov buffoons!

  6. Alan says:

    In Texas you can use deadly force to stop malicious mischief after dark.

    TPing a yard is one of the examples used in many CCW classes I’ve been in. Daylight – no deadly force. After dark – deadly force justified.

  7. Claude says:

    The homeowner may also face charges of animal torture for making the fox drink a case of beer and falsely imprisoning it until it went pee-pee. :)

  8. doug in colorado says:

    ONe question with a follow-up…

    Where does one obtain fox urine….and Why would one go to the trouble, when a leftover bottle of father’s day Hai Karate aftershave would have been sufficiently disgusting and would have enabled the perpetrators to be identified later, just as well or better than fox pee.

    D in CO

  9. OrangeNeckInNY says:

    You can order fox urine online. People use it to repel groundhogs from their property.

  10. Flighterdoc says:

    OK, got it. Next time some punks trespass on my property for a ‘prank’, I’ll dissuade them using something other than fox urine.

    Starting with Bear Spray, and ending in things measured in calibers.

  11. DirtCrashr says:

    Why not just hose ’em down with sprinklers and a high-pressure firehose – that’l make them wet (might knock them off ladders) and the TP soggy, and the cold air should do the rest during influenza season…

  12. doug in IN says:

    When kids were doing this to my house last summer I considered an ambush with a paintball marker – bruises should be a good identifier, too.

    I’ll have to check the Indiana laws, I guess.

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