The .223 of Beer

I asked Bitter to head out and obtain, for our sacreligious three bean chili, some cheap beer.  I said “Maybe a 12 pack of Rolling Rock or something.”  What she got was an eight pack of Rolling Rock, since the local bar (thanks to Pennsylvania’s byzantine liquor laws) only has limited 12 pack selection.  Well, eight pack would be fine, except that they are bottles of beer apparently marketed to midgets, at seven whole ounces a piece.  So really, the eight pack is like a four and a half pack.  I told Bitter:

“These are the .223 of beer.  I mean, sure, it’s beer, but it takes twice as many to knock a man down.”

I’ll be sticking to my full house Victory Hop Devils from this point forward.  It might not be the prototypical “cheap beer” but it’s cheap enough, and it’s a hell of a lot better than Rolling Rock.

17 thoughts on “The .223 of Beer”

  1. Can you find anything from Dogfish Head Brewery (in Delaware) around there? Their 90 Minute IPA rocks (if you cooked with it, though, you would deserve to be thrown into a swimming pool seething with enraged electric eels, with a lightning rod protruding from your most intimate orifice). It’s at least the .50 BMG of beer, if not the .600 Nitro Express.

    I’m actually not as much a “hophead” as a lot of serious beer geeks–at least as far as flavor hops are concerned. I do like a lot of bittering hops. If you can find Buffalo Bill’s Alimony Ale (The Bitterest Brew in America), give it a try.

    Dogfish Head, by the way, pioneered the continuous hopping method, whereby they continually add hops, throughout the boil, to get massive bittering, massive flavor, and massive aroma.

    Yeah–that’s right–I’m a Second Amendment Absolutist and a beer geek. Got a problem with that ;-)?

    III

  2. Oh yes… Dogfish head is one of my favorites. The 90 minute only comes in four packs in these parts, but a four pack is all you need :)

  3. The reason I suggested Victory HopDevil is because it’s more available. It’s a 10 mile trip for me to get Dogfish head. Sadly, I have to travel to New Jersey to get a good beer/wine/liquor selection. The only two things New Jersey has on Pennsylvania are beaches, and alcohol.

  4. Years ago, they used to sell it in 750 ml bottles (fifths, in other words). It was a less convenient way to drink it, because you had to have someone with whom to share (unless you wanted to really get hammered), but somehow, it tasted better than the 12 oz. bottles.

  5. Beer will condition better in larger vessels. At least if it’s not pasteurized beer. I have been known to brew my own, but these days I haven’t had time.

  6. I did a little brewing many years ago.

    We had a couple successes, and several . . . less than auspicious endeavors.

    It’s kind of tempting to get back into it now–I think I know enough to be better at it by now.

  7. dude, you’re talking about Rolling Rock. i doubt that mildly yellow water could get a man actually drunk even if he drank it from a fire hose.

  8. You should consider trying a single bottle of Dogfish Head 120 Minute IPA

    ;-)

  9. I’ve tried the 120 Minute. I prefer the 90, and for the money, I really prefer the 90.

    For that matter, the 60 Minute is very good for when you want to do some more sustained beer drinking than would be a good idea with the 90, but still want a serious beer.

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